butterflies

so amazed

2010-09-04T21:51:00.000-07:00

.

2010-09-04T05:46:00.000-07:00

as hard as I've tried to concentrate for this coming Monday examinations...I'm controlling myself, certainly I am. fretting over s&^%#d calculations that I hope I don't have to understand. How I wish it could be easier like algebra, or more like A Math. Depressed so much over things that has already been said over...fiqah its over, its over . I must stop all these...lighter note

I've got henna, it makes me smile, it makes me happy . though its just a HENNA. 20 bucks for 2 hands. I'm getting the henna on my own , would rather design it myself. huh

.

2009-01-02T07:06:00.000-08:00

Pastikan - Siti Nurhaliza

Lihatlah Langit Di Atas Sana
Tersenyum Melihat Tingkah Kita
Selalu Ada Peristiwa
Yang Membawa Pertengkaran

(2)
Maksudku Hanya Ingin Yang Baik
Untuk Kita Berdua Dalam Bercinta
Baiknya Aku Buruknya Aku
Terimalah Aku Apa Adanya

(Chorus)
Pastikan Kau Dengan Aku
Jangan Ada Cinta Lain
Tak Pernah Aku Terlintas
Niat Ku Untuk Berpaling

Maafkanlah Aku Sayang
Bila Belum Kau Bahagia
Sejauh Langit Di Atas
Kan Ku Kejar Bahagiamu

(3)
Biar Langit Dan Bumi Meruntuh
Biar Jasad Kita Tertimbun Di Sana
Tetap Bersama, Tak Ingin Lepas
Mencintaimu Ku Jadi Begini

CATS

2007-11-30T21:25:00.000-08:00

It was really fun! yes fun!,& like finally yeah everyting is set done. All our hard work, to perform the skid for CATS project. In fact, not only us who had actually done a skid, but all of the groups in our class. [surprisingly] haa. now i don't get it why that when i asked pple whom have taken CATS before they say it is boringgggggg. well, i guess it depends on the kind of tutor that they have. Ours are so motivating and he is the one who have mke it interesting! lovesssssssssss. can't wait to make e final product. Next week, have to give him the proposal. What we have done covered almost 30 pages, including the skecthes of product design.hmm not really but some sort of a comic design. soooooooooo relieve.finally!

when it ended,met Fahila to discuss about email writing session. We have not done 5 qns! yes 5!. Last minute work.haaa,and now i still have not done 2 qns.XD
going back home, i took the food that i have order at Rit'z ''in the underpass.the e clair and vanilla/choc puff is soooooooo nice i tell you.crave for more! maybe next time,haaa aite till here.2 email writing must get done by tonight!

I hurt my knee

2007-11-28T21:58:00.000-08:00

It is so sad! i'm terribly in pain.tell you the story, i was "happily" going to school last monday. "nolar"! haha, ok i was early that day, looking forward for microeconc tutorial...and when im alighting from the bus, there is a sudden pain in my knee, [something that i could not explain] i almost fell down...luckily not or i'll be embarassed..yes! sat at the bustop for 45 mins...to wait for fahila..since she was late for sch and took a cab...cab drive to blk 56, it was still painfull like &%#^i just want to scream my lungs...i can't even take i step.

i guess i'm the ONLY girl limping in school that day, everyone was looking at me...i know what's on thier mind/ [what's wrong with that girl? tsk tsk] but who cares, its my leg, just act as if you don't know and don't look at me like i'm a #!*%@. i limped all the way back home, climbing the stairs makes me sick even its only the 2nd floor. my parents asked me what happen, i just kept quiet cause they don't know how i feel, its not the right time to talk to me...till night finally my parents bring me to Tok Nen house. i feel alot better than

the very next day, which is on tuesday, i didn't turn up for school, i want to cry so badly..really! cause i'm going to miss business stats tutorial and lecture. tell me, how can i miss it. its so impt to me...nvm i handle it well, i know i can cope with it even without all those classes and guidance.

and today, yes i have to turn up! i did, well, because of computing information processing presentation. weightage is 35 %, so yeah...i drag my two legs there..but the pain is much better..it was a relief that everything is over! yes CIP.

tmr not attending for class, bcomm is e-learning and CIP workshop is meant for the other 3 groups in my class presentation...yes but still hve to go out, meet my CATS group for discussion, we hve wrote the script but hve yet to act it out..this is fun! haaaaa, i think i like CATS so much..hmmm, the tutor makes it so...well i don't have to tell you that..you're not interested anyway.. CATS is bored for many pple....right so tmr meeting them at woodlands civic centre, for the sake of me, we're supposedly to meet up in sch. since i have not yet recovered...maybe we hanging out at Mac, or Starbucks Coffee. mention Strabucks ...makes me sick..i'm so sick..sick for that job, how many times i regretted fir quiting, i won't stop saying cause i will keep on asking at woodlands civic for that %$#@*^ job.!

updating

2007-11-28T07:18:00.000-08:00

it has been mnths since i stop updating.i've lost links,links! of my friends, searching for it soon. (:

family bursary award

2007-11-11T13:48:00.000-08:00

Last thursday, we had a family gathering at masjid Al-Khair. There is an occasion where bursary award is given to cucu2 dan cicit2 of our late grand beside my father. It was so shocking for me because i was interviewed by Cik Laili for receiving the best performance !. [last year i got 12 points for my O level examination result] It was so embarassing i tell you...he asked me how my parents motivate me...how did i acheive that kind of result...what is my advice to my young relatives...huh. It was the very first time ever! I feel good anyway.haha & for receiving the $150 voucher of Capitaland Mall, I can go shopping!...My dear cousin whooooooodaaaaaa she receive cash $200 and Mahsury who is now currently finishing her O level this year..she receive the same voucher as me. What i feel about this gathering is that...yes! good for us because it motivated us to work hard and i had a planned in mind. This is not only for me and my parents but for Allah swt.
I want to get to University.InsyaAllah =)

After giving out the vouchers to the receipient like "US" haha...we ate delicious food...one of it that i like the most is Bik Suria doughnout! yum yum..one with strawberry filling and the other one was with a white chocalate/chocalate sprinkler filling on top. It starts at 10am and ends at 12pm...then all my family (relatives) went to nyai house.

It was a great day
Last meal that we ate was
Bik Minah's beef steak!!
It's Hooooootttt =)

Still did not receive pictures from Cik iffah,when i receive it,i'll upload
pictures of the event.

happy 18

2007-11-06T05:36:00.000-08:00

Thanks to my beloved sis and mum for celebrating my birthday at pizza hut. i lovess pizza =)

And to my lovely friends whom had message to wish me, i'm blessed to have a friend like you. I really do.

Just a picture of beloved mum & sis . I didn't snap the pics of the food! because we were so hungry and straight away grab the food .haha.

2007-10-22T05:43:00.004-07:00

there is a cut-off werid,nvm
pangang ko sayo
we won't miss any of the episod .my dad,mum,2nd bro & ME =) my sis was not back from school yet,s yeah she miss every episod! lol ,she'll always ask me what happend?what happend? aiyo..my 1st bro just came back from school and i think playing his PORTABLE PLAYSTATION is the only thing that makes him happy.that's horrible! he careless anyhow.ouh mentioning about him, it goes to my second brother too,THEY with thier LIFE PORTABLE PLAYSTATION.ouuhh please,just for s second can you put that thing down? In my opinion man are more addicted [sort of lar keh??] with this sort of gadgets.Huda you agree with me right?.why i'm metioning her name ..lol....here it goes,now huda two sibs azri and zuhairi BOUGHT thier own PORTABLE PLAYSTATION.don't be surprised,our cousins are all into this THING.huh guys!adi,saufi,syafiq,indra. nowwwwwwwww im exaggerating!!

CIP bored

2007-10-22T05:43:00.002-07:00

when i got back home it was exhaustignly tiring.this is BECAUSE of the stu' Computing Information Processing that is damn boring.many of my cliques complain,many whom just left the lecture room even while the lecturer has not finish her speech,isn't that so rude??.i can't retain my anger at that moment.this is my emotions..well offcourse i don't show it off..they could have done that at the beggining of e lecture don't they? stu'.its bored i know but can you at least be considerate ?how would the lecturer feel? stu' idi'.even though i MYSELF did not pay attention but fair enough you have to at least respect the lecturer as a student right?.k enough

as usual,straight back home i ate my mum's cooking [u know my fav food is mum's cooking .(anything!!).it was about 5:15 then,as usual ,my whole family watch our favorite drama show pangang ko sayo,we won't miss any of the episod .my dad,mum,2nd bro & ME =) my sis was not back from school yet,s yeah she miss every episod! lol ,she'll always ask me what happend?what happend? aiyo..my 1st bro just came back from school and i think playing his PORTABLE PLAYSTATION is the only thing that makes him happy.that's horrible! he careless anyhow.ouh mentioning about him, it goes to my second brother too,THEY with thier LIFE PORTABLE PLAYSTATION.ouuhh please,just for s second can you put that thing down? In my opinion man are more addicted [sort of lar keh??] with this sort of gadgets.Huda you agree with me right?.why i'm metioning her name ..lol....here it goes,now huda two sibs azri and zuhairi BOUGHT thier own PORTABLE PLAYSTATION.don't be surprised,our cousins are all into this THING.huh guys!adi,saufi,syafiq,indra. nowwwwwwwww im exaggerating!!
k till here,got to finish up my assignments,tmr is a long day,going back at 5pm.
school life =(

2007-10-20T20:10:00.000-07:00

the ghost in me

lovely iman, she poses so well

my gorgeous sister

2007-10-20T06:24:00.000-07:00

i love her many2.she's the only one that makes me laugh everyday.loveeeeeeeeeee u

hari raya

2007-10-20T04:09:00.001-07:00

ouh forget to mention about hari raye celebration.as usual its fun meeting up with my cuzins but different though without paman [he's working at qatar] but he'll be back very soon during hari raya haji hopefully! nyai miss him so much.first day stay in grands house till night.helping her out.we slept over at her house and the next day at 6:30am we rush home to get our raya dressing...our families book a bus on the second day and we didnt knew it..it was tiring i tell u since that i didn't sleep well at grand's place.but anyway everything was "perfectly" fine.
now its still raya. (:.going out with family tmr (:

school reopens

2007-10-20T04:09:00.000-07:00

days pass by so fast..and well school starts,sem 2 i guess it is a bit slack...i think it is not as difficult compared to sem 1. [terrible].its fun! for the first week .when farhana and i met up with dearly "huda". i love her lar..k if u reading this ..jgn kembang sudahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (:. assignments piling up for sure.ok its going to be fun.i'm going to make sure this is a serious sch work. [i learn from my mistakes] "u dont have to know k". looking forward yeahhhhhhhhhhh. and to HUDA!!
meet up alwz kkk.love u .muahahaha.

2007-10-04T09:59:00.002-07:00

feelings that will never change

2007-10-04T09:59:00.001-07:00

with every breath that i take i know that this feelings will never change and i wonder why oh why should i have ever felt this way.this feelings just seems so wrong and till now that i deny

2007-09-29T00:08:00.000-07:00

i think i look different this days hmmm

lots of cleaning

2007-09-28T09:04:00.000-07:00

this hols im not working.spent time cleaning my house ouh i tell you its fun haha.just feel great that i do a man's job! =)yesterday i'd clean my whole bedroom not even a single dust left! the wardrobe,com table,q bed,study table,2 side table,wardrobe mirror .its all perfectly clean =)

mum is sick now,just now mum & i went to geylang .buy stuff like we normally do during mnth of ramadhan.spent over 500+ over $$.thats huge but its normal to us..2nd round yet to come but im not spending anymore.hope she gets better tmr.

dayout with cuz

2007-09-12T23:45:00.000-07:00

strolling arnd in e city.ate at cavana,marina square lepak at starbucks one fullerton.syiok to release stress muahaha

ayu / dara

=)

..

2007-08-31T05:26:00.001-07:00

cute cute iman

cute10x =))

isnaini

locked mum in the kitchen hahahahaha.

Kenduri at Grands house..went back at 10:30.

!!

2007-08-29T08:53:00.000-07:00

Im so frustrated with frinedster...i viewed my profile and
there's one box showing my currently what i've view..and i was likeeeeeeeeeeeeeddd
what the hell..it shows a grossful scene everrrrrrrrrr!
huh.frust frust..i didn't even view such thing..serioulsy..how can they show up in my profile..totally pissed off...no matter how many time i delete it..its still not delete.argh

Shafad Birthday

2007-08-29T08:41:00.000-07:00

It was a great night out with wani,rai,syak to
celebrate fad birthday. Can see from her expression
that she's happy.Thanks to wani =).
We watch movie the ratatouille around 6:40.
It was damn funny i tell u and i can't stop
laughing.i would give rating of 5.
Fad was as usual.*laughing like an idiot.haha.=)
Then we ate at pizza hut,sat there for quite long..
after we finsihed eating...i went to take the cake
that wani and I reserved..its a nice sponge white/dark
flaky choc cake.big for us to eat and for fad family.
reached home at 11pm.
fad then message me..she's thankful
im happy for her =).
that's for today..

the b'dae cake =)

light up candles *18

wani seems sad.lol...she's tired...one day preparing for fad bdae

wani,syak and bdae gurl.still need to get photo from wani...didn't tke much.=)

Sad Sad

2007-08-26T00:09:00.000-07:00

Grandparents came yesterday.happy happy.=)
sad sad,my uncle is going to qatar for job
so we're not going to hve hari raya celebration at grands house
it will be at ayu's house...it would be great to hve it in my house
but you know my mum..she's not well.

Im bored now .really.
when it comes to find job im *lazy
just can't move out from my bed!. haha
*sleep sleep.
ONE DAY SOON.
argh.so hard for me to go bp.
planned: Starbucks back.
that's it.there's no other job in my mind.
ramadhan is coming very soon...preparation is not done yet.
don't want to describe any furthur...
zzzzzzzzzzz
* waiting for my parents to be back,i havent ate my lunch
they're going to bring me food.hungry!

BMGT

2007-08-18T06:20:00.000-07:00

BMGT - Terrible.

study for POA
so irritate by my upstairs neighbour..
don't know what noise are they making
sick !. xD

BLAW over!

2007-08-16T23:43:00.000-07:00

I'm so relieved!..finally BLAW test is done. I find it easy..100 marks..total feel so good about it =). Business organization 2 was not included..study so hard for it..haiz.nvm.tomorrow BMGT.
XD

ouh just now i was on my way back home after my exam paper...
i alight as usual at bukit panjang to take 963 966
happen to sat next to an old chinese lady..
she keeps on swearing and i don't know why..i'm so quite irritate
actually because she was looking at me as if liked she wants
to stranggle me..haha..its so funny...she keeps on swearing again in chinese
i couldn't understand...getting so uncomfortable i asked her why
since she sat beside me...she said that she's frustrated waiting the bus for so long
i asked how long was it..she says 10 min. XD.hmmmm..10 min dosent seems long to me
maybe she have something urgent to attend too
she swear again XD XD.just hope she feels relief talking to me
vent her frustration at me. i undersatnd how she feel even for 10 mins??
usually at that area the bus is always late..i've even waited for 40 min. but i don't swear like her,haha...people will think i'm crazy..
i'm patient anyway.haha
soon the bus came and ya!! she was so rlief.hahahahahha.

<3

2007-08-16T05:14:00.000-07:00

when i'm sad..there's alwz my bedroom for me to sleep on....
=)

Vintage love

2007-08-12T02:24:00.000-07:00

Love for black vintage

Studying BLAW

2007-08-09T02:03:00.002-07:00

Blaw for today and and and
Macro!burning midnight oil
that is what i always do
i'm like the owl...stays
awake
at night
and mum keeps on naging at me
fiqah..go to sleep..i'm going to plug off the
wirless net...stop surfing ,stop chatting,stop studying
its time to sleep...
i'll alwz listen to radio 89.7,98.7[best hit!]in my room
& mum will alwz
threaten me...
if i don't sleep she'll bring the radio to her bedroon..
who cares...brrrrrrrrr.nag nag nag..i keep on telling her that i
can't sleep at night
she won't understand..what she know is just to say go sleep!!
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

anway the thing that alwz make her angry because i alwz woke up late in the morning..
XD

=)

2007-08-09T02:03:00.001-07:00

cuzin huda!

studying in library with hanisa.
Happy B'dae Singapore...!!.
Mugging for examss

hmmm

2007-08-08T02:30:00.000-07:00

business liked?.=)

....

2007-08-05T08:16:00.000-07:00

I'm done with POA ,so relieve!!! test on 23rd August..hmmm 2 wks ahead..tomorrow attending for the POA remedial..i didn't do quite well for the previous test..my tutor spot me ..lol!haiz...should have study really hard for the previous test..know that i can do better. 50% for the final test..the other 50% includes the 20% common test, 10% class participation,10% quizes..and the other 10%?...i forget.nvm....

doing more

*12:00 am Solitary
Favourite!
zzzzzzzzzz

Exam next week

2007-08-03T09:33:00.000-07:00

My post before exam.Sorry guys, i know my blog is so boring haa. And i didn't even link anyone. Can't force myself to update. I have lost interest in blogging since i start working at Starbucks last year Nov. Anyway i still find blogging as a way to express myself and for you to read. hehssssssss. I love you guys ok. =)) (my lovely friends you know who) -_-. I know you get bored viewing my blog. i know. and i don't bother to update also. hehsss.

I have this problem..seriously..i don't know how what i should do.I can't stop forgetting about the past. Exam is coming, i'm doing my revision...i have this feeling that the revision i do is so much different from my past sec...you know how much i miss the days..i didn't have the motivation..the motivation i used to get from the teachers in my sec and my friends i miss them loads..sometimes i just wish they are there to motivate me. Its not that i'm struggling with my studies..this poly life i must say is pathetic for me...really have to depend on my own..and its liked everytime that i study is all on my own...there is no encouragement from my friends that i can do better and not even from the tutors, maybe they did but its not the same...life is so much different now.

I know the best for myself...even if i failed for any module,i know that it is the way i want it to be..i don't put in the effort, i didn't do revision, there's no way that i'm going to be stressed up. But for this sem 1 the weightage is 50% for each module...trying my best to do revision for each topic...i'll make sure i'll score well and i always think this way...

not to upset my love ones

this is the only way that makes me to focus on what i want to acheive

how i wish i could be in sec sch again.
i miss i miss
the teachers and friends i used to have.

Frust

2007-07-23T20:38:00.000-07:00

I'm so frustrated.frust frust. I didn't came for BMGT lecture,it was at 9:00.My next class was BCA Workshop,i came for it and you know what!,i was in a hurry and tought that i was late and when i reached at the front of the class ,there's no one inside.huh.Called Aishini,she said there is no class.Now i have to wait for BLAW lecture at 3.argh.

Hey !

2007-07-21T06:48:00.000-07:00

hello,my dear friends.i miss blogging actually.Hmmm,there's much to say.i'm doing my revision.i'll do much blogging when i'm free =))
i miss i miss all my dearly friends
Much loves =)

2007-07-07T21:08:00.000-07:00

people please dun link me.!!

hmm

2007-06-23T05:48:00.000-07:00

i cut my hair!!!! =(.hmmmm..now its damn short.

>
bout yesterdae, went out with fana,nis,fiza,syaf,saf and her bro
play badminton at woodlands sports complex..finally i get to go out with them before the sch reopens on monday.=).and they took carzy pics..i was in it also huh.
i don't fancy taking pictures actually.aite.till here.still need to complete hy homework

Happy Birthday Sis

2007-06-20T00:21:00.001-07:00

Happy b'day to my beloved sis.!luv her lotsss..alwz call her fatty bom bom,cause she is.ahahahahaha.Celebrated at Swensens,the meal was quite nice.
*lurve the fried mushroom and the baked chicken rice with cheese on top
Happy b'dae>>>>> My wicked/bitchy sis.she is! xD

hello ladee

2007-06-08T00:13:00.000-07:00

Next week going back to my secondary school Wrs to do community service.ahaha.as if
not community service,its just teaching the sec 5 studens.They are seating for thier O level examinations this year and Mr Soong asked for our help.ouu then i can meet the teacher's!wooo hooo..miss them a lot.I want to see Mdm Suzanna,the discipline teacher.She used to teach mother tounge for my class.Great teacher indeed.haha..good motivation.My form teacher Mr Bruce.=D. Mr Yap,physics teacher!..ouu his the best.lol
strict but funny.lol.good motivation also.All the teacher's are inspiring!
thanks for everything from the bottom of my heart
and now that i'm in poly *winkssssss

Tomorrow going off with my cuzin huda to watch silat competition at NUS.I'm going there to support my friend actually.Farhana.Good luc too her.can't wait to see her tmr.yeah..
aite till here..i'm blogging
=D

I feel so bad.

2007-06-05T01:30:00.000-07:00

ouuuh..feel so bad for not updating my blog for so long
i miss blogging...goin to update soon..
life is just so great..fun..but in the same time lots of challenges
soemtimes i feel liked i'm lost.i feel there's no where to go
and the ppl that i need the most is not with me..
so sad..i feel so bad so bad...i miss them so much and that
special someone..one thing i tell to myself
--just be true to yourself
--nothing will go wrong
--you will feel you worth
--living in this world

feel so bad
one of it--
i guess living starbucks is a wrong idea
now its hard turning back
damn it
i miss working there
seriously
i miss the ppl
everything bout starbucks

2007-05-24T00:19:00.000-07:00

My lovely two indian friend.carck jokes alot..especially that suria!

2007-05-18T00:23:00.000-07:00

old pic taken..i alwz miss my dear cuzin huda..sees her evry wed..but she's a busy girl women right now..having attachment at wat science park...luv lotz;)

2007-05-14T05:24:00.000-07:00

they left me!!!..ouu actually i left them..ahaha..i missed going out with them

Exams

2007-05-12T23:57:00.000-07:00

Exam is just around the corner.Got to study..study study.
;)

2007-05-12T00:21:00.000-07:00

see that levi's spect!isn't it nicee..cool.just bought it.

# i'm back! #

2007-03-04T15:07:00.000-08:00

gossh it has been so long that i have not updated my blog post.i'll surmarise what i'm gonna say..boooo
nisa did remind me to update.ermmm.no feeling..my life feels so bored...or i just assumed it that way.Actually my life is complicated..very hard for me to explain.arghh...what did i write in my previous post?ermm..it was 16 jan.ouuh ya this year big event for me was the release of O level result.i'm so happy for what i acheive.is it too late for me to describe ?haha.it has been almost one month.nevermind.you know i'm confused as to where i should go.jc or poly?it was a hard decision for me.finnaly i ended up taking media and communication for the first choice[SP]second,business administration[SP],third,biomedical science[SP],forth,psychology and community services[NP].The result is coming out soon 6 march!!.not excited at all though.since for the last 2 years,i wanted to go jc..but suddenly everything change...i know my weakness well..i'm not good at english you c...i'm sure it's going to be tough for me to cope.general papers...revising textbooks......huh.i hope its the right choice overall.ermmm...what else...yeahhh congratulation to jemimah!!she's the top student in my school.so inspired by her...she's a diligent girl.8 A1s and 1 A2!!ermm..congrats to enghin and afreizal too...wish them all luck....and and AND congratz congratz to all my beloooooooooved frIEnds for making to poly.wish u all luck too in the coming future.missing u'll lotzzzzz :(.*shedding tears........*wake me up when september ends.

for the past two months..there's a lot of challenges i've gone through...*sad for me to leave STARBUCKS!!i know its my decision.[[on the 28 of feb,i'd write a resignation letter to hari]][[before i make my decision,i met emily*district manager of psa b.thnks to her for giving me a plentiful and good advice.i appreciated alot.For sure one day i'll come back to do a service for starbucks coffee..it was a great learning journey experience.Having to go for attachments at raffles city,paragon,vivo city,marina square,bukit pnjang plaza,world trade centre..allows me to meet different kinds of pple.i learn a lot from them.too much for me to descibe..just keep it to my self k.haha.But specially thanks to bb,sebestian,eileen,kristie,hari,hendra,kak su..my store partners...without them i would not have come this far.i appreciate every single thing they have taught.thnks!.miss them much too..

DATE:23 FEB.COREEN MY bata store manager called me!!!shocking isn't it?now she's at raffles city..with uncle..i heard dian and ah kae stilll working with them..haha.i guess coreen wanted me to work with them back.haizz..to far for me.can't wait to meet them.lurveeeeee lots.muahahahaha.* i don't realise that i'm actually i hardworking person..which makes coreen to call me.hahahahahahahahah.she still rmbr me!!!

So far there is no much changes in me.haha. i only realise that my hair has grown longer...haha.DATE:26 feb[went out with fana,nisa,safiah,niza,fiza...we go town..did buy some stufzz..not that much..yeah..my first shopping with my friends since i get my first pay..not as good as i'd work at bata HAHAHA.i did more shopping with my mum anyway..we went out at 10...till 8...tiring mann.ok that's for today.mayb i'm goin out tmr to town..alone...its going to be a big day for me!!!i have something special...surprise surprise..signing out...

*FIQAH

# LAST DAY #

2007-02-28T23:03:00.000-08:00

28 feb..last day as a barista

happy new year

2007-01-01T01:09:00.000-08:00

happy b'dae mas.happy new year.goodbye 2006.*fond memories..sadzzzzzzzzzz.
200000000007
*new resolutions
kind of lazy to update.
zzzzzzz

# New chapter of my life #

2006-12-23T01:15:00.000-08:00

erm..huh..it seems for a quite long time i didn't send in any post.yeah..have been very busy lately...and i'm quite stress with my job recently.It's not easy to adapt myself to the new environment.You know..liked meeting new people out there..especially those who are much older than you.iSn't it a bit weird?haha.aite I'm working as a part time barista.I'm relieve that kak sue call me & say that i pass my bar test.*=D anyway i don't think i did well but at least i'd try my best.[having to memorise the recipes espresso/frappucinno beverage,skills in pulling shots.. knowledge about coffee,interacting with customers/engage them in conversation,steaming milk,efficiency in your work,create a teamwork amongst your parners*beverage calling,pos register,brewing coffee and tea,promote sales,know about merchandising sales/my resposibilites as a barista,remembering customer name&*their coffee..,creates a third place for customer...,provide good service*delivers legendary customer service to all customer by acting with a customer comes first attitude..yeahh..there's a lot more.can't mention all.All that i can say is ..its a great experience getting to know my store partbers[kaksue,bb,eileen,hendra,sebes,jinwei,kristie,]& partners from ther outlet..last saturday went for barbecue [emily's district]it was fun.

thanks for everything that they have done..now i've finish my barista learning journey..i could not have make it without the help from them..i feel very welcomed ..they are friendly.Even its hard to get along..u c..all of us are of different age..[i'm the youngest..beside jingwei*16],but hey..age dosen't matter..its your true self..if you are the kind of person who like to meet new pple..it would be more fun.& yeah i like challenges in life..its great getting to meet those pple ..u get to gain more experience & trust me life is hard out there [u hve to bear with it]sooner or later then u'll get to enjoy the fruits in your life.

For one month i have been with them..i'm not sure whether i shall go on furthur.After getting the barista certification..*maybe..i want to be a coffee master.[its hard].you noe..eileen especially has inspire me..she's a great person..haha ermmm..*should call her abang..SHE had actually completed her coffee master within 1 motnh if i'm not worng..isn't that very impressive!.everyone has its own potential..like kak sue,kristie,hendra,sebes,bb[all of them have their own abilities.& infact i'm impress with all of them..
aite.i shall see first..how's my decision.

I can't wait for my O level results..for me studies are very important.But IF u know how to juggle with your working life and studies that would be more good.it makes u a better person.whatever it is...i'm still concern about my studies and what course i should take...

My resolution for year 2007!!!!!!:i want to be independet,more determined,...........HUH I THINK there's 2m2m.nvm i keep it to my self **my resoultion for new year 2007!!!.hahahahaha

merry christmas to everyone.=DZZZZZZZZZZZ.

2006-12-23T00:07:00.000-08:00

dream land..wake up!

www.hostdrjack.com

# A MATH PAPER 2 #

2006-11-16T21:10:00.000-08:00

hmmm...finally i'd finish my A math paper.sadzzzzzz.no more doing of math and receiving worksheets from mr soong.=(.ermm just now i went to find job with fana.I really wanted the job as a promoter but Mr Chim didn't called me back.sadz.In the end i get a job as a waitress.aiyo..i'm not sure whether its right for me.i think it's a bit boring.YOu noe..i'm the kind of person who likes to communicate with people..like being a salesgirl...Being a waitress u can't talk much.LOL.forget about it.I still have one last paper!!.combined science MCQ.yeahhh looking forward to it..hope i can score well for it..coz the last SEQ qns for phsycis is a bit tough.huh.And i have nightmare thinking of those qns..which i might not answer correctly.Mr YAP!!

# I WANNA CRY #

2006-11-10T20:45:00.000-08:00

today is the last day i'm going to do my math..my E math..i'm goin to miss doing all the papars that Mr Soong gave it to us throughtout this year..u noe..i've always devoted myself in doing math.Its just part of my life.Once i'd said that i dislike it..but now it is totally different...I just love math so much.haha lol.and jingwen say i'm crazy for studying math the whole day....once i started doing i can't stop.I just can't help it you see...haha.You have the feeling of satisfaction when you get to solve something.that's e idea!.haiz...i wish i can stay longer in wrs.going to miss all of them so much.......the teachers...& all my beloved freinds...i'll never forget you...

# .. #

2006-11-04T15:25:00.000-08:00

You won't know how happy i am if i had sit for my O level examination papers.Its a big deal to me...you see..it has been so long that i have been waiting for the actual day.Others are also preparing..and i'm hoping that they do well.Best wishes.

Until now i can't stop thinking about him..even though it had been few weeks..i wish to tell him but i'd never get the chance..

i'm missing you
missing you
& forever it would only be you.

plz hear what i say...
& i'm referring to you..

thnks to my friends...i love you.
041106
i've turn seventeen!!!
all the wishes...sweet of you guys.

# .. #

2006-10-31T12:40:00.000-08:00

You'll never know how i feel.and i know u like it that way.So be it.

# .. #

2006-10-22T12:40:00.000-07:00

Nature is my soul...and him that will stay in my MIND forever.You know i can't forget ...forget you.and i'm referring to you.YOU.you.why can't he understand..i'm speaking with honesty and i'd realised since the very first time when his eyes almost tells me evrything..and i know u do know..i know you do.

can't live without him.
never.
& you didn't spoke to me

ps:spelling error in e previous post....quite of lazy to rewrite..
zzz

# .. #

2006-10-09T12:40:00.000-07:00

There's a hidden smile and sadness..but you can only see the smile..the convivial of her is vivid..and she have to tell him that she's at the end of one corner of the room crying for him..wanting him..dreaming of him and hoping that he'll come to bright up her day.
cause she can't live without him...her life is meant for him..and she want him to understand.............

# .. #

2006-10-08T12:30:00.000-07:00

Still entertaining him..his a friendly guy...seriously i've never met such guy like him.he's a malaysian guy whom i known from farhan..he's attzach to a girl who stays in UK.her name is...i dunnoe who.haha.can't remember...age 14..his age 16..but we do get along well with each other..anyway that's all about him"phat all".still chatting with him & i can't sleep...later mornin got religious exam.aiyo.

delwyn.
Now i couldn't hardly regconise him...i've never imagine to be with such guy.[huh]he's totally differnt person.i don't kind of like him anyomre..its a nightmare.You know i'm alwz interested to guys that are decent and have positive attitude towards acheiving his goals in life..ermm..i kind of like soembody.But i don't know whther he like me..nvm...if there's love..there's alwz love....know what i mean?haha.i don't like to chase over soemone..man should approach girl first..right?confession is hard..but why can't he say it...

# .. #

2006-10-06T12:30:00.000-07:00

I kind of feels the pressure right now..i don't know what seems to be such a big burden to me...seeing those results..even mine is a pathetic one..but i should at least be happy with it....cause i improve by 6 grade overall....anyway knowledge is more important..its not only the matter of acheiving good grades...we should enjoy learning and keep on improving ourselves.aite2.Anyway i'm not too good in my acadamic fields...i think i can acheive better if i had taken art...music...you know..all this stuffs that dosen't requires..math,science..blablabla.nevermind..i can still drive myself towards both aspects...everyhting is very meaningful to me.I want to be a successful person...and i have very strong ambition..which offcourse..i can't describe..its very personal..indeed very10x personal.I know one day i'm going to acheive that.And offcourse like i say...it dosent's really look into acadamic potetial...pssssttt..want to know something...

ps:actually i hate science and math....really...i just hate them.
i have no idea why i'm scoring well...not that well lar hor..haiz..sundae got exam[religious exam]anyhow,i'm quiting...next year..]

i hope the they could make it to poly...although it seems that it is not feasible.They only need not to be discourage...i think most importantly is the motivation...once they have it..they will keep on immroving...i'm just trying the best i can.i'm not an agel nor a devil who can save their life!!!!....huh.sometimes i'm goin mad thinking about how they can cope with their life...it makes me stress....aiyo...dunnoe how to describe..why should i born with this soul..no no..i can't say that.i should appreciate with what i'm born with...aite till here.tmr teaching leon and lihua.i'm not sure whther i can make it..very busy latly..helping mum in making cookies& biscuits!!...yummies...then got to do more revision..6-10 hrs per/day.perhaps.

# .. #

2006-09-29T23:30:00.000-07:00

I guess today is a terrible day for me....i can't tell what happened...i'm sure none would believe..seriously..i'm so depressed....once in a life time that i encounter such things...right now i'm blaming myself..although it seems crazy.....why should i anyway..i just don't understand...i feel like killing myself...i can't bear to see my friends...upset with thier results....really..it was very shocking...that made me cried...i'm concern for ila,fiza,wani,leon,syazana,safiah,.......azimah....hui yuan.......its hard for me to describe...........i can't forgive myself....really.....

# LI YI #

2006-09-17T00:33:00.000-07:00

hee..she message me.kind of miss her.li yi!!!.can't wait to meet and go out with her.such a sweet and caring friend.hahax.
miss

# I WANNA FAINT #

2006-09-15T15:13:00.000-07:00

This whole week has been terrible.I didn't come for school for two days..how's that?i did on purpose..i'm just too stress up with life right now..but no,i'm not giving up on myself.You see,its because of my english.yeah..Mr soong is right,i can't be too harsh to myself.thanks nisa,fana,fiza,jingwen..wani..you're such a great friend.i'd really appreciate your advice and concern.Anyway,its not only me huh...i'm not sure whether others feel the same pressure like me.aite two days of break..didn't seemed enough.

one whole week i feel like fainting..even today.
gosshh while waiting for the bus...i'd almost FAINT!

# ermm #

2006-09-09T14:30:00.000-07:00

Creating a new blog...

# AKEELA AND THE BEE #

2006-09-04T14:45:00.000-07:00

I'm back..from watching movie with fana and nisa..yes..the story is very inspiring..i like the character javier..haha he's so funny..nisa i know u agree with me.aite2.i just love the story.

# TEARS #

2006-08-30T16:43:00.000-07:00

I can't control myself.it was very tense that moment...what miss wong say is true..and there's no use to regret.thanks jing wen,faezah..for ur concern..i guess i'm being too emotional.

# SHE'S MENTIONING EVERY SINGLE THING THAT I SAID IN MY PREVIOUS POST! #

2006-08-22T15:30:00.000-07:00

Miss cheah actually mention every single thing that i've said in my previous post...huh.do we have same mind?she's actually frightening me..she emphasis again that we need to do revision in preparation for our Os...i didn't take too much of consideration but the thing is i'm worried about my future..its not the matter of good grades..it is what i want to be!!!.you understand..?Previously i do have difficulties in coping with my school work..but know i'm moving on to a better pace...its a big deal to me on what i really want in life!!..i'm not sure..i'm so confused...i'm being to ambitious and career-minded..whether i want to be someone who got something to do with media..or being a teacher..bussinesswomen,writer,newsreader bla bla..and you know what..if can i want to be all of those.tHAT'S CRAZY.so how am i going to settle this..i'm not concern about anything else [except english].whether i get A1,A2,B3,B4,C5,C6.it dosent matter!!!!plz..can someone give me suggestions..haiz...better ask mum.miss cheah is frightening me..

can't log in blogger again..for this few months or so..can't
wait for mum to buy me ladtop..my personal one..arghh.
shut that com.

# MISERABLE #

2006-08-17T19:51:00.000-07:00

Now,it came to my attention that i have to make a decision.Whether its going to affect me or not.but is it possible or isn't?.i'm feeling miserable...Why at this point[THIS MOMENT]of time..she seeking for my concern.Yes i do concern about her.Seriously..i wanted so badly to see improvemnet in her.It dosen't matter what subject ..math,eng,combined science..though you can't expect it to happen without sacrificial.she's one of my closest friend.YOu know who.[seven years of friendship]not likely that we'll be separated apart..never.At some point i do feel that ya ryte..why can't i just ignore her..that's make my life easy..my most happiest scene would most probably to see her successful & believe me....i would be more glad to see my friends acheivement rather than myself.i simply can't understand myself..should i neglect them..plz..& another girl she's troubling me.You know who u are..i'm not angry with her but i want to say..plz..this is not the moment for you to enjoy life..which one is much more important?i'm willing to do anything for her.But if she can't appreciate what i've done,that's fine with me.I won't tolerate such person.Its your future and whatever it is,it will determine where you will go.[no use of crying over spilled milk].Her attitude dosen't make me craze..how i wish that she can make better judgement in life.its ok..like i say..do whatever you want.i'm sure she wouldn't like people to give her advice because it seems to her that it is some kind of nagging.[and she'll get frust]fine.fine.Anyhow u may wish to seek me when u realised everything is coming to an end...& u know one thing i could do is to say sorry because i can't help you..but i'll give u the encouragement and support ,yet that still would not be enough.

why is it hard for him to confess
i know his heart,& he keep denying
i wish to tell him
how much i miss him

# DON'T FEEL LIKE WRITING #

2006-08-17T00:32:00.000-07:00

just a pic of the past...lol.. haiz...tired..

# ERMMM #

2006-08-15T22:39:00.000-07:00

I've just met del just now..& i want to say that i really miss him so much!!..miss him always..Its his birthday & he's celebrating it with his friends at town[craze].I'll alwz love him & forever love him as a friend...he's a kind,sincere & honest person.May god bless him with a decent life.

I wemt for night study,but i didn't seems to have the urge to ask questions.Studying at home is more preferred.I have a clear mind & there is no much of a distractions.I can study in bed,my study table or computer table..that's more of a comfort to me.I just love my room.Guess i'm not going for night study anymore..i can't focus to much.

Tomorrow ashraf can teach me chemistry!!.he's good.At least there's someone who can teach me other than "MRS WHELAN" XD.[last list of teacher whom i didn't adore]ermm..still can ask eng hin hor..haha.He's too smart..but anyway i didn't really relate with him.I bet that he will be the top O LEVEL student next year & WRS building will collasped beacuse 5N1 is going to cheer for him!!!
haha.[A history again].I know he can make it...wish him all the best.
yeah..i'm so happy ,can't wait to clear my doubts...[all QNS in PYS CHEMISTRY]

AITE TILL here...zzzzz i want to lay in bed ,listening to the radio beside me & revise my goeg notes....zzzz..then go sleep.[I love music!!]

# 40 degree #

2006-08-13T00:13:00.000-07:00

Ouh,i've just recovered from high fever.Yesterday night i caught with flu,asthma,cough.[terrible].You know, i'm sensitive to cold drinks & junk foods..like icecream,chocalate..my throat are not longing for this.If i don't stop consuming this junks..i'll suffered for days...so one way to prevent it is to drink lotz of warm water.I don't mind.Mineral water is essential for your health!!.Hey,that's gumptions.[ouh fana i check it first,u noe what i mean hehe].Suppposedly today i should go to the library to teach shiqin.It seems that i want to control everyone!!!at the same time i'd also promise to teach faezah A math.ermmm.What am i trying to do?i guess i wanna be a teacher..?ermm.argh nvm.So,as i was having a fever..i can't make it...but i try to make up another day.[feeling miserable]but i didn't do it in purpose huh.aite2.

I'm not sure what i did for geog will benefit me.I still remember.."she" told me[sorry,didn't quite rmbr her name],we're using 1% of our brain & 99% of it is wasted.yes..itz true.The first & the last lesson ever with her is really to a big advantage.farhana!!! i can still rmbr that meaning.."SPINDRIFT".[only fana knows what i'm talking about].School life is a road learning...infact there's so many ways that we can adapt to in order to make learning more interesting..nvm.let's be it...

I'm still wondering why dad had bought the shoe.its 'DEMOCRATA'!!
[DEMOCRATA!!]any saleperson in BATA are wooing to sell.If you get to sell one pair of that shoe...ur mood will be happy,because u get the $1-$1.50 comission.[I know its a pathetic one]but huh its a big deal to us!!!..& also to the manager.Uncle especially.[manager].And mum had said to coreen that i'm his daughter...so embarassed man...& coreen ask mum why she hadn't seen me for long time..& mum said i've been busy preparing for Os[right,at least mum say the true]but on the actual fact i do not want to drop by at BATA.sure uncle will ask me fiqah,fiqah...ur're working again at BATA?& we'll going to fuck off each other.haha.i'm quite close to him.You know,uncle like to scold badwords...we're like friends..& sometimes i'll beat him up.You can see from his facial expression that his a fierce man..haha.but u won't know the real of him.His wife,coreen,alwz like to tease him..she said uncle is a big fat pig..& our staff will laugh like hell.i miss those memories though.I'm not sure bout working again.Its only for experience.aite.get back to the point,coreen gave dad a $5 discount!!& that democrata???euuu..why can't dad spent on other things.shoes?.i'm sick and tired of it.

One reason why i'm so discouraged to do the job because its bulky..i mean when we have to shift in the stocks..in the store there is about thosands of shoe!![THOUSANDS]i can't figure it out on where to slot in all the boxes.You also need to rmbr every single one of it.bubbblegumers,weinbreiner,marieclaire,comfort,...+ i'm afraid of heights..its damn tall..actually guys should do tiz kind of work...in few days..i get to do the job well..but its tough.THAT'Z WHY.aiyo...dunnoe leh...i miss uncle & coreen so much we're like one big family.There's tiz one day when we have to stay overnight to packed the stock..if you can rmbr during the december holiday[u can see BATA shop is full of boxes].WE went back about 2am..& uncle gave me money to take the cab...kind of him isn't it?then uncle send fida,jeremy home...coz thier house is further than woodlands..what a fond memories....

# MT "O" LEVEL RESULTS #

2006-08-11T18:10:00.000-07:00

Haiz..5 distinciton from sec 5..that's bad huh.I mean i was expecting more to get distiction.Not quite happy particularly many of my friends like wani ,nisa,syazana,faezah,ila,azimah & the guys they have to make the option as to whether they want to retake or not.haiz..why can't all of them pass with flying colours..i feel sad for them .as a close friend to nisa & fiza...i have the sense of guilt.i should have help them with Mt,but in the first place i thought they were good in Mt .no doubt.huh.Now they have to work even more harder.Actually there's no way that i can help them for malay.It is a LANGUAGE.[similar to ENGLISH].You need to read more newspaper and storey books.ermmm..why i can't do the same for my english..u noe i've always read malay newspaper without fail..it is just a habit...ermm..and watching the news on TV.But maybe e main reason why i'm gud in Mt,coz i am a very poetic girl..i wrote poems mostly about love...& nature..it do help in ur vocab.& also writing lyrics..haiz.. my English WAS 10x much more worst than malay.You know..fana said if only this result is meant for english..huh.[I'LL FAINT].iMPOSSIBLE.haiz...can't say anything...i'm too desperate to see them happy.happy with their result.it dosen't seems to end up like i thought.As a friend all i could do is to give them a moral support..this is not the end..there's a second chance.& they can prove that they can do potentially well.Not forgetting the chinese student....they must be terribly upset...i guess its tough.how i wish the time passes with smiles in their faces.Sometime i think life is so unfair...really.

I went back at 4..my whole conversation turn out to be disastrous..i jumped into politics and govenrment.Anyhow,i kinda like about politics...[interesting]Maybe i can't figure it out in english..but yes..for malay.arghh.[ALWZ MALAY]IQA.

When i see freak..i feel sympathy for him..he's really good in other subjects but not malay..so how is he right now??huh.He told me that his parent are sure to get frustrated.hope things turn out well.

congratulations to farhana!!.My beloved friend..hey..she improve by 3 grade!!can u believe that..wah...lately she alwz get the same mark as me..who knows perhaps she might be the top O level student next year..[Second "FARHANA"]haha.hey i'm serious...nothing is impossible right?she's a bright student..i'll be happy for you farhana.I believe everyone have the potential to be one.Its the hard work,peseverance&determination that counts.aite till here.best wishes to everyone....& congratulations to my cuz,hayu,suhaili.ex-fren fatin,safirah,rai...&+++..u noe how happy i am to get in contact with them again!!

# TIRED #

2006-08-08T14:32:00.000-07:00

Ermm.The natiOnal day celebration is so boring..i mean the performance.I might as well dozed off in bed till 11am then wake up and do my revision for chem and phsics..but hey..its NATIONAL DAY!!.i'm singaporean..brrrr...=D.OK LAR..about the T-shirt design..quite enjoy the song that is sang by "mR chong!"haha.psstt..hey people don't know i could sing.haha..nevermind.i'll sing to my [future husband]..only the choir members knows my voice.haha.crap off.i miss singing!!.
Actually i & fana wanted to go out..but we have no idea where to go.haiz..anyhow i'm tired..i need some rest to study tonight.
two days of holiday is for revision..just bare with it..haiz..time is running fast..seems impossible for me to complete all my new ten-years series revision..chEm,physics,math,eng.
OUUH yar..this friday is the MT o level result..erm.plz...i wish i didn't get an A2.I didn't do well for my compo.huh.wait wait wait.

I love to eat pitza!!mum will bring us to pizza hut tomorrow.hopefully.she promise me & my sis.all italian food.sphagetti,lasagne..yummie..=Dbut stLL i prefer mum's cooking..chicken blackpepper,tandori chicken,chicken rice,& all the chicken chicken///.hahax.i also love turkey food,like roti nan,kebabs..huh..ambrosia &luscious!TMR IS PIZZA HUT DAY.aite till here.HAPPY B'DAE SINGAPORE!!!!!41th independence.what the hell i'm shouting here...argh but no celebration for me.[revison revison & lotz or revision]X(

# I'M BACK #

2006-08-06T01:04:00.000-07:00

I'M just back..haiz...tiring.A day out with fana,shiqin & siti.It has been so long that i didn't attend some sort like a motivational talk for ladies..very interesting..The ustazah is humorous..& it ended with seeking forgiveness.I feel like staying out at night..it's peaceful...walking along the pavements...no vehicles..no crowds..no one ...a time for meditation.Unconcious mind may lead to mishap & unoccasinally something that you did not want to encounter.Life is miserable..almost torturing like heaven.do you agree?.one of the topic that ustazah raja zubaidah emphasis..."Do not stop gaining knowledge till death.[A large extent of agreement]In this world i'm seeking to learn..be someone that could lead the world..withstand the sinking world..[in my religious term]i assmue all muslim should agree.Even i am gradually losing out to the vast improvements.One day,each and everyone of us will witness the unproportionate males and females.The females will outnumbered the males.Its going to be significant.Trust me.tHERE's alot to mention but i guess only muslim can understand it.Humans are born & that is why they are meant for death.Nothing is exceptional.We live for a reason.How the universe,earth,stars,moon,sun exist,offcourse man don't create it.Many will say that is "NATURE".Yes.And what do you understand about nature?[Think about it].In this world..we must learn to appreciate...the people around us...[everything].& you must deeply believe the existence of "ALLAH".

[its already in the morning...]
i've clear my doubts about e math..
guess there's alot more to asked...
friday and saturday.
bare with it.

i regret that i refused having tuition for my english...because i think it won't help..actually mum want me to have an extra class for math and english.Math was not much of a problem.I think i have the potential to work things out on my own..I remember during my primary school days..i always get grade 3 for math..which means a C6,& my PSLE grade was C.Right now...i seems to have no problem..a miracle indeed.& I love math!.Back to the point..about my english..i read dictionary ..& do lotz of grammer pratice.[like for physics,chem,geog] i help myself with reading encylopedias'..a lot of information!very interesting..anything that you want to know..radiation,speed of reaction...pollution...i'm so indulge with the book.index A-Z.huh.I LURVE IT.You didn't have to refer to your texbook[low content]

haiz....so sleepy but yet could not shut this eyes
there's no other place like home..
queen size bed,air con,pink quilt & five pillows..
+ indulging myself with icecream=bread!
zzzzzzzzzzzzz...i want to sleep!

# WHAT PHAT ? #

2006-08-03T16:15:00.000-07:00

HeY fana,he's one of the most friendly guy i've ever met..i talk with him like we're so close...he's talkative just like me.wahahaha..[best seh ckp ngan die..mcm tak leh stop gitu.]AITE.hEY ASHRUL!!!..HE'S a sweet guy...hahaha.hey fana?where did you find that guy.sesat eh kat singapore?kesian....i'm waiting for him to come to singapore..wouldn't that be fun!wow..i lurve it..he's not demure at all.Honestly i think he's crazy.Why should call him papa?abang?takder name lain ke..issh budak ni...
sorry for the malay esscense.ouh i'm undercontrol of this malaysian guy.[he's crazy]

# PHEWW #

2006-08-02T20:00:00.000-07:00

guess this is my most happiest day!![i can log in my blog]that's a bit lame.Anyhow,there's something wrong with my com.I want to talk about her,want to talk about him,about her,about him,,her,him,her!I mean jemima,wani,illah,faezah,nisa,fana,hui-yuan.[Let's not talk about him because its a bit personal]

Hui-yuan.
ermm..What shall i say about her?.ok.Now i seems to get the point why people can't mix around with her.Its not bcoz she has an attitude...or maliciuos..her personality dosen't suits at all.can you imagine yourself without company...?clique?.haiz...what does she want in life?.i'm trying my best to be close with her..but i can't.She just don't relate well with me.She's too quiet,dignified,serious & calm.-a sedate].Anyhow ,i'm glad that she's willing to express all her feelings to me.How sad it is.There's this one time i say to her...,i said..that she really need to change herself..be friendly ...communicate with them even if you feel awkward.I know its hard...but u need to sacrifice to gain the trust of others,make them realise that you're not bad afterall...thier way of thinking..the mentality & mindset.get it right!.huh.She care less about it.i don't know what else i could do..to make it clear

Faezah
she's in deep pressure..[can't cope with A math]i'm not sure whether i had made the right decision..its a big responsibility..i've promised her...if she is concern for her A math..i am more willing to help her..no matter how hard it is..you're my friend fiza...you're acheivement is my happiness..now that i'm worried about is,to manage my time....i need to do more revision& get the basic right..[there's an ebb in my A math..i'm relatively undergraded]fana,nisa care for you...[if u read this].plz don't think negative fiza...

about the others that i've mention...nvm..keep it to myself..too tired to type out.
del del del//

# hahaha #

2006-07-15T15:45:00.000-07:00

i can log in my blog...[in the library with fana]...hehehe.

# UPDATEZ #

2006-05-30T20:45:00.000-07:00

[230506]The worst movie i've ever seen. Davinci Code
[23-270506]Malay intensive.Stress
[260506]Bought for safiah b'dae present.Anglia
[280506]Miss sulika,she's so pretty on her wedding day!!. Sweet
[290506]Malay 'O' level paper.Quite easy
[300506]NYP trip.Boring

--cAN'T remember when it is,His eyes almost tell me something

Lihatkan senyuman yang ku pamerkan
Bak penawar bila kau duka
Jalinlah ikatan kita.Aku hampir
rebah dalam dakapanmu
Mengintai di setiap sudut memori kita
Dia telah menhancurkan anganku
Bayanganmu tidak pernah luput dari ingatan
Aku menghitung hari hariku
Suasana yang hening dan hampar
Mengusik ketenteraman jiwa ini
Sayu memandang luar jendela
Hujan renyai -renyai jatuh ke bumi
Seakan akan mengerti dengan perasaan ini
Linangan air mata jatuh ke pipi
Aku mengesatnya.[tenang]
Hatiku ditusuk bagai sembilu bisa
Sakitnya menikam kalbu
Secebis rindu aku pendam untukmu

Lenyapkanlah kesepian
Dia yang menawan hati
Sejak pertama kali bertemu
Kenyataan ini amat pahit
Namun,aku redha menerima
Ombak yang menghempas pantai
Bagai menghanyutkan diri ini dalam tangisan
Bila mana kasih tak fahami
Ia takkan mengerti
Bila mana kasih menjauhi
Ia takkan peduli
Bila mana kasih tak sudi
Ia takkan kembali
Tiada guna memendam perasaan
Dia telah meninggalkan ku
Buat selamanya.

ps:nothing to do with me...i just lurve
to write poem!.sad isn't it?

# SAD #

2006-05-13T23:55:00.000-07:00

I'm all alone in the dark.i'm not sure whether ________its going to be very serious.I'm afraid to face the reality.I hope "this" is not happening,I wouldn't know i could handle it or ......not.

# WHAT SHALL I BUY FOR HER? #

2006-05-08T15:40:00.000-07:00

Ouuhh i'm so happy for miss sulika.She's getting married end of this month.I thought of buying her a bedclothes.think its ok?dunnoe leh..i message fana..but she haven't reply..tiz gerl ar alwz off her phone.k tat'z...wanna sleep..i'm sick...

-miss him

# FEELING MISERABLE #

2006-05-05T12:35:00.000-07:00

Since when did i become i role model?.nisa?.haiz...i dunnoe why at times i just look down on myself.Geography & S.S paper was disastrous.I didn't attach section A qns paper,i didn't remember how to ans SBQ qns[L1,L2,L3,L4,L5]The type of qns like reliability,usefullness.I didn't expect british state welfare to appear in SBQ&i was really weak in that chap.tanks wani for her attention.She knows how i feel & e most sweet thing bout her is that she actually message me yesterday night and ask me not to be so upset,she was worried seeing me after e test paper.Anyway,i feel a lot better.I knew what is my result goin to be like.tat'z..tiz afternoon meetin my cuzin!!ayu, mas,huda& iman!!!muackx

# HUMANz TMR #

2006-05-04T20:50:00.000-07:00

I have no idea what i'm doing right now.I'm supposed to study u see...but then i'm just too tired.[i'm goin to do badly for mid-year]
[what happen just now]itz very irritating when someone called you&you didn't even know the person.IRRITATING.I miss having caller ID.haiz..if anyone dial my no.i can track them!

The mind has a thousand eyes,
And the heart but one;
Yet the light of a whole life dies
When love is done.

--Francis Bourdillion--

# LAST REMINDER #

2006-05-02T23:20:00.000-07:00

A gentle reminder to myself[IQA!!!!u have to see Mr Soong this friday]

# UPDATES #

2006-05-02T00:00:00.000-07:00

[290406]
This term ,I'm all screwed up in preparation for my mid-year
exams--And there's lots of schoolwork,chapters to catch up with .
You think its easy for me?Particularly ,I'm upset with myself.
I ought not to care about anyone.I mean ...like ila,she's totally
giving up on her studies and i was like ...ouuhh ila please don't
you ever give up on yourself.--But now,NO...i didn't encourage
her,i didn't support her,i didn't motivate her.I simply let her be by herself,struggling with her studies. I'm nuts!.How dare could i
done that to her--she's been with me for 7 years.The fact ,she'd
never appreaciate what i'd done to her. So ,why shud i waste
my energy on her?why?why?.I'm not like an "Old"iqa.But why?.
Iqa used to be caring and alwz motivate her friends.But now?. Argh.What happened to me?.Perhaps, i'm stress..
i cannot cope with my studies--but though deep inside
my heart i still care for them. I'm confused,i'm disappointed with myself=(

In few months time,bro is going to continue his 3rd &4th year in ite.2nd bro ,will stop working and continue his private studies in BMC.{concentrate}.

Soon,i'll be sitting for my prelims,then o..Everything is going to be very drastic.Then coreen or uncle might call me & ask me to work again in BATA,coz i've promised them i would.But no..Maybe i'll find another job,like being a promoter, librian or part time tuition teacher.I think to far..hey iqa, u can't predict the future.

[300406]
Grandparents came.Lil ayu wanna go study at civic library on mondae..[what a coincidence) but she almost forgotten itz labour dae..& library will be closed.

[010506]
Mum's cousin from pakistan came by surprise.HuH.I dun understand thier language.Last few weeks was a visit from grandfathers cuzin,he live in australia.I dunnoe that dad have relatives there.ummph,wateva.

# BODY ACHING #

2006-04-22T07:30:00.000-07:00

http://www.smashers7nisa.blogspot.com do log in to nisa blog My whole body r aching.

# UMPHH MISS THEM SO MUCH #

2006-04-21T02:32:00.000-07:00

Iman!!!cutie...miss her.

Nisa.Fiza[kayla].Neeza[danny]
Safiah.Azimah.Fana.

Huda.Ayu.Mas.[miss].Iqa

fida.coreen.ahkae.dian.imah.wani.
lina.ain.ani.rafiz.ouuh..miss uncle too=(

# OUUH I LOVE YOU SHAFAD #

2006-04-20T23:42:00.000-07:00

She's so sweet.Surprised when she message me just now.So happy tat now she's more interested in nursing.I'm happy for u shafad!!!.huh.Why afriezal?.He's decent,innocent,cute..shafad.shafad.You noe wat i like and some of my friends admired bout him...."when he blushed".wait for my kol k fad=)

# YOU'RE NOT ALONE #

2006-04-13T13:00:00.000-07:00

[110406] I can paced the deepest sorrow,depression,sadness,
frustration,confusion,anger,hopelessness and even the complex roots of their life.Divorce parent,drug-addicted father,a rapist,imprison brother
financial problem,desire for sex,pregnant girl,hatred towards her family...its more than that.If only i could bring bring happiness..but there's no way...its far too impossible.You noe for one reason why i care,I am willing to hear,be there,beside them....--Hold on to your tears.I know its painful to bear.Reflect on what you had done and no turning back.No matter what happens,the secret will not be revealed until hell freezes over.
[120406]Thank you amelia,azyan,it seems that the whole level know about it.haiz.
[130406]Its raining...my class is cheering out loud.so is 5/2.Everyone makes a difference.ouhh i love all of you...muackx.We r united...so u guyz must promise tat all of us r goin to make it for poly or JC.=)!!

# COMMON TEST #

2006-04-06T22:55:00.000-07:00

*A math*E math*Chemistry*Physics.
-kirimkan salam buatmu kasih .kian pergi bersama memori indah.

# EMM.... #

2006-03-24T18:32:00.000-08:00

APM.STUDY.STUDY.STUDY.I MISS YOU.

EVERY NIGHT IN MY DREAMs i C U I FEEL YOU...TAT IS HOW I NOE U GO ON...FAR ACROSS THE DISTANCE AND SPACES BTWEEN US...U HAVE COME TO SHOW U GO ON...NEAR FAR.....WHEREVER U ARE.....I BELIEVE TAT THE HEART DOES GO ON....ONCE MORE YOU OPEN ...THE DOOR AND U'LL HERE IN MY HEART AND MY HEART WILL GO ON AND ON...

LOVE CAN TOUCH US ONE TIME AND LAST FOR A LAST TIME...AND NEVER LET GO TILL WE'RE GONE...LOVE WAS WHEN I LOVE YOU...ONE TRUE TIME I HOLD TOO..IN MY LIFE WILL ALWZ GO ON...NEAR ...FAR...WHEREVER YOU ARE...I BELIEVE THAT THE HEART GOES ON...ONCE MORE YOU OPEN THE DOOR AND U'LL HERE IN MY HEART AND..MY HEART WILL GO ON AND ON...

UR HERE.....................................THERE'S NOTHING I FEEL.....AND I NOE....THAT MY HEART WILL GO ON.....WILL STAY FOREVER THIS WAY...U ARE SAVE IN MY HERAT AND MY HEART WILL GO ON AND ON.....HMMMMMM....

lalalalalala...i'm so stress....

titanic-celine dion-

# EXHAUSTING DAY #

2006-03-18T22:02:00.000-08:00

I went out at 9:30am,to plaza singapura....then to suntec city&millenia walk to exchange the Renu Bausch & Lomb solution to a $12 voucher..arghh.its so far!!!.very tiring seh.....i never want to go to that place again...never.then reach home around 6+.so tired........

I bought a "THOUSAND PATHS TO A PEACEFUL LIFE"at Times bookstore.u won't noe how happy i am.The book is so cute and small...but yet it contains wonderful phrases which means a lot to me.Each day i will read at least one.i'm stress.I quarrel with my sis &mum.Now,it have been three days i never talk to them...but then i do try to make the first move....mum is ok...but sis is much more irritating...she's the one making the trouble so why should i apologize to her??.arghh.i even bought for her a notebook just now...and put it on her table....but she simply ignore it.How's tat???.She didn't make the attempt to say thank you..or make some remark.Isn't that difficult??.
Sometimes i just wish i don't have a sister.She's making my life complicated and miserable.Each time if there are misunderstanding between us ,mum will side on her.Mum didn't even want to know who started it first .Enough talking bout her...

I'm not focus.I could not even start doing my chemistry homework.There's so much thing happening to me.For the past 7 days i didn't stick at home...ila,fana,wani called me to watch movie lar..go studaylar...meet shafad lar...and i have dozens of work to do...my geog project...it seems that i'm the only one doing it...since i'm the leader....nvm.Its not a big deal anyway.My appointment with her,english test,math remedial,choir....too much...

Almost every saturday i go to the library...mostly to civic coz its near to my house.NOTE: there is a self study corner at national library..emm tat'z sounds good...maybe one day i will go there.I need a different environment....u noe how bored it is going to civic when u get to see or bump into someone u never wish to see!!!!.terrible.i don't want to see him!!!.

# I'M CONFUSED #

2006-03-15T18:45:00.000-08:00

How i wish i never knew him.

# HAVE I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION? #

2006-03-11T22:38:00.000-08:00

I went to plaza singapura with my mum.emm....nvm.get to the point.lazy to sae.I have spent alomost $800 for my stupid decision.maybe not.argh.i'm so confused.everyweek need to meet her.furthurmore,its so far.Mum asked me to go there all by myself.how could she??.nvm.want to meet wani,ila,fana,miss wong,...arghh.STRESS liao.how could i help them if i can't help myself.....u tell me....forget about them.plz iqa...u need to sort things out...."YOU" or "THEM"?.One more thing...from now onwards i'm not going to be kind.k......you all are too much!.till here.huh.

# WAKE UP IQA #

2006-03-09T17:45:00.000-08:00

I assumed that i get C5 for all my subjects.rYte.From now onwards,no computer,no TV,no shopping,no going to the library,no recess,no listening to music,no relationship,no reading of malay novels,no chit chatting on the phone,no sleeping in the afternoon,no more updating of friendster,no hanging around with friends,no playing with sis,no going out on saturday,no more late for school[[detention]].AITE....study,study
study.....i 'm trying to forget "him".I can't get you out of my mind.I'm trying to avoid him as much as i could.get it.

# SHAFI B'DAE PARTY #

2006-03-04T20:44:00.000-08:00

I think i ate too much...i'm so full.Yummie..all e food r delicious.
Ayu...u take pure chem &physics...?wah...very though seh...my teacher stressed on it too.They say normal acad students are fortunate...emm...study hard.we're goin to make it together!Need more pratice in your a MATH=)

The news about 3 year old child missing...how i wish those kind of people never exist...My history...i rmbr ...when i was 7 years old.........................................forget bout it.Its the most frightening tragedy in my life,coz in "that" moment i could have been kidnapped.......

--SOAL HATI-- bh.4mac06
Dalam laut boleh diduga,dalam hati siapa tahu.
Ertinya:Perasaan seseorang itu tidak dapat diduga
Peribahasa lain yang sama makna:Dada manusia tidak dapat diselam.
Peribahasa tadi menepati maksud sebuah hadis terkenal:"Bahawasanya di dalam tubuh badan manusia ada seketul daging.Apabila ia baik,baik pulalah seluruh badan,tetapi apabila ia rosak,rosak pulalah seluruh badan,Ingatlah ia adalah hati".(Riwayat Bukhari dan muslim)
Dalam kosa kata melayu,"hati" boleh dikaitkan dengan istilah-istilah beikut---sanubari,naluri,lubuk perasaan,hasrat,batin,jiwa,syak&firasat.

Konsep hati amat akrab dengan erti"budi"sehingga tercetus sebuah ungkapan 'hati budi' seperti dalam ayat berikut:"Sebagai isteri,engkau tak tahu budi suamimu sehingglah sudah lama bersamanya,"nasihat Mak tom kepada anaknya,Fatonah.
Erti "hati budi"ialah perasaan terpendam yang sebenarnya mencerminkan peribadi sebenar seseorang.
Oleh itu,apa yang dipaparkan oleh seseorang itu mungkin "berpura-pura'"atau tidak jujur.

# AN APPLE A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY #

2006-03-02T11:45:00.000-08:00

My dad usually bought apples...& mum says that its good for health.I happen to eat it just now...and i realised there's something got to do with me and the "apple".weird.The fact i do love apple.emm.I didn't think to much cause at that moment i'm doing my physics.So whatever it is....argh..simply ignore it k.

I should have called my dad hp no.&meet them at cwp.Missed the opportunity!!!.Mummy,& you told me to make the decision between you & the stupid "___"i've always wanted...nvm.Right now i'm devoted towards my studies."COMPLETELY".note that iqa.

Careless...about others..."see no evil,hear no evil,say no evil."Am i becoming an evil then??....haiz...no one could understand....how i feel.Its the nature of soul...to have sympathy,love &care.One thing...to describe...i love all of them so much.May god be with you,as much as i do.

--APPLE??--

till here.apple?what does it got to do with me?again.

# EMM...#

2006-03-02T01:30:00.000-08:00

!!i'm still not asleep!!arghh.OUT OF HERE.mum!!

# EMM...#

2006-03-02T00:55:00.000-08:00

*Thanks to "you",you'd guided me along.All my life ,i've never been so thankful ..oh my god..WHAT am i trying to say??..emm.YOU'LL find out one day.Trust me that its going to be the most precious&sweet memories ever.May god bless you in life.A friend that never wish to noe, the one who reallie i'd admire is "YOU".

arghh.i'm so sleepy.can't shut this eyes.

# LOVE'S WITNESS #

2006-02-28T00:07:00.000-08:00

--PARABLE OF THE FOUR-POSTER--
Because she wants to touch him
she moves away.
Because she wants to talk to him,
she keeps silent.
Because she wants to kiss him,
she turns away
&kisses a man she does not want to kiss

He watches
thinking she does not want him.
He listens
hearing her silence.
He turns away
thinking her distant
&kisses a girl he does not want to kiss.

They marry each other--
a four-way mistake.
He goes to bed with his wfie
thinking of her.
She goes to bed with her husband
thinking of him.
--&all this in a real old-fashioned four-poster bed.

Do they live unhappily ever after?
Of course.
Do they undo their mistakes ever?
Never.
Who is the victim here?
Love is the victim.
Who is the villian?
Love that never dies.

--ERICA JONG--

# LOVE'S WITNESS #

2006-02-28T00:01:00.000-08:00

--A PRAYER FOR INDIFFERENCE--
I ask no kind return in love,
No tempting charm to please;
Far from the heart those gifts remove,
That sighs for peace and ease;

Not peace,nor ease,the heart can know.
That ,like the needle true,
Turns at the touch of joy or woe,
But ,turning ,trembles too.

Far as distress the soul can wound,
This pain in each degree:
This bliss but to a certain bound,
Beyond is agony.

--Frances Greville--

# LOVE'S WITNESS #

2006-02-25T21:58:00.000-08:00

--SONG--
How hardly i concealed my tears,
How often did i complain,
When many tedious days,my fears
Told me I loved in vain.

But now my joys as wild are grown,
And hard to be concealed;
Sorrow may make a silent moan,
But joy will be revealed.

I tell it to the bleating flocks,
To every stream and tree;
And bless the hollow murmuring rocks
For echoeing back to me

Thus you may see with how much joy
We want,we wish,believe--
Tis hard such passion to destroy
But easy to deceive.

--Anen Wharton--

# LOVE WITNESS #

2006-02-25T21:40:00.000-08:00

--SONG--
O love!,that stronger art than wine,
Pleasing delusion,witchery divine,
Wont to be prized above all wealth,
Disease that has more joys than health;
Though we blaspheme thee in our pain,
And of thy tyranny complain,
We are all battered by thy reign.

What reason never bestow
We to this useful passion own;
Love wakes dull from sluggish ease,
And learns a clown the art to please,
Humble the vain ,kindles the cold,
Makes misers free,and cowards bold;
'Tis he reforms airy fops to think.

When full brute appetitie is fed,
And choked the glutton lies and dead,
Thou new spirits dost dispense
And finest the gross delights of sense;
Virtie's unconquerable aid
That against Nature can persuade,
And makes a roving mind retire
Within the bounds of just desire;
Cheerer of age,youth's kind unrest,
And half the heaven of the blest!

--Aphra Behn--

# LOVE'S WITNESS #

2006-02-25T21:35:00.000-08:00

--WHY?--
Why did you come,with your enkindled eyes
And mountain-look,across my lower way,
And take the vague dishonour from my day
By luring me from paltry things,to rise
And stand beside you,waiting wistfully
The looming of a larger destiny?

Why did you with stong fingers fling aside
The gates of possibility,and say
With vital voice the words i dream to-day?
Before,i was much unsatisfied :
But since a god has touched me and departed,
I run through every temple,broken hearted.

--Mary Webb--